Currently Listening Begin to Hope By Regina Spektor -- Fidelity see related

News FLASH

My permit is valid Summer is coming Daylight savings time is pretty pimp My brother isn't happy or well I want to go somewhere right now... away I'm debating a lot of things in my life. Second guessing everything. Right now the main doubt is how I feel about Kevin. I... right now, love him. And if not, I'm just very infatuated with him. Cassie is the coolest ever. I feel like my summer is going to be the bomb because of her. She's been letting me really unload lately, and I'm very lucky to have her as my best friend. I also wish to be new friends with Amanda. I think I have a sleep disorder I have puss filled glands I wish I had a nice singing voice I need a better deoderant I want a root beer float very badly right now and um, I'm in a very huggy mood.

That's two rainbows and a giant hug for you.

Balloons included if you get me a root beer float.

Peace!

Currently Listening Running With Scissors By Original Soundtrack, Various Artists - Mr. Blue see related

I keep forgetting that I have a xanga. I don't know if I really want to talk about much going on in my life though.

I had a good break. I went to Monterey with Cass-a-dass, and I loved it so much. I missed the beach.

School's not too great. My GPA is pretty dang low. But, maybe it wouldn't be if I actually was provoked with the desire to learn.

Oh well, I bought a book the other day at Barnes and Noble. Here's a passage I wanted to share. It's from a poetry book.

Eternity

He who binds himself to a joy

Does the winged life destroy

But he who kisses the joy as it flies

Lives in Eternity's sunrise.

- William Blake.

Hope that makes your day.

Currently Listening Sublime By Sublime -What I Got see related

Hello...

Well I have recently returned from my exciting midwest voyage. Kansas was a rootin' tootin' blast. Seeing my family was fun. My cousins are the coolest. And I got to see my nana and papa. Her hair is coming back, but I think she has her bone scan tomorrow and I don't think it's going to be good. I hope it is though. She's such a strong woman. I wasn't that emotional. In ways I wish I was so I wouldn't feel so expressionless. What really got to me is my papa. I thought I'd headbutt with him because he's so opinionated. But he looked at me and was like, you sure do look like your momma. And your nanny. and there is a picture of my nana and my papa on their refrigerator when they were teenagers. (They started dating when my nana was 13.) And I wanted to cry here. because he looked at that picture when I said well, I'll take that as a compliment cause nana sure is a looker. and he looked at it and he just said. yup she was. still is. still is. and looked at his feet. I hope he'll be okay. My nana is all he has. Apart from that, the journey home was strange. I was stuck in Texas for like a hour and a half on the runway in a noisy plane. journey home seemed too long. got sick. whopee. But I'm back now! yay. Sick as a dog but getting better. missed both new years parties! Which was such a bummer. New years eve I passed out from exhaustion at around 10 PM. I'm hardcore. whoo. So I've been trying to put myself in better spirits. Wearing jeans instead of sweatpants now, and I left the house for the first time today. Kevin has been so sweet to me. The day after I got back he called wanting to hang out but I told him I was sick. He came over and brought me flowers. We watched a lot of TV and he saw me at my grossest. I was throwing up and I told him he should leave so he wouldn't get sick but he stayed until I feel asleep that night. I woke up to find myself tucked in, the flowers by my bed and I note that said, I hope you feel better soon. He's been keeping a real eye on me and this sickness. It's kind of odd. It's almost like he's being maternal. He'll remind me of which medicine I'm supposed to take and he comes over when I tell him he shouldn't and gets me water and blankets and everything. It's quite nice, actually. I feel like such a tree killer. So many Kleenexes... *sigh*. Ah well, I'm emotionally getting tired from writing. 9:19, yeah I'm such a night owl, so I guess I'll leave it here and come back, or leave it here until next time.

I miss you all! Can't wait to see everyone again for those who still read this!

Currently Listening I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning By Bright Eyes -- Train Underwater see related

Look who decided to show up.

Do you ever get in moods for food? And when you satisfy that mood, it's like an orgasm. Yeah well chinese is doing that for me right now. I've never had an orgasm, but this chinese is coming close. Mmm. Okay that was weird. And now, some of you might have thought me as dead, thanks for calling, but no, I'm not. Internet was down, and now iiiit's aaaliive... muhaha. Alright so. Many moons have passed, and I don't know what to say. Holly Jolly Christmas is coming! What does everybody want? I'm making cookies as well. Oh, I'm so hungry today, I don't know why. My thanksgiving was great. Saw my Grandma and such. School has been alright. Parents kind of... meeh. I love them, but they both have been getting on my nerves lately. With personal stuff and just their little rants and such. Graaaah. I'm anxious for Christmas. I feel like it actually fits this month. Speaking of this month, I'm in love with the weather. Yesterday I went on a brief walk with Cassie and the weather was perfect. It put me in the happiest, most peaceful state. I was very content. I want to travel. It's not a need right now, but it's a major want. I've been thinking about my life lately, and I find that I am forming this list in my head of things I want/need to do before I die. For the time being though, this year, I've set up some goals/happy times for Kim.

I want to go camping. And I want to go fishing. Stay at a Lake House. Go to San Francisco at least four times. Make a dress. Write more. Get my permit. Maybe take up dance again. Volunteer work. Board games- I want to play monopoly again. Dance- anywhere or everywhere. Have a bonfire on the beach with friends. Learn how to surf. Join the Badminton team. Learn how to speak a different language by myself. Go to Santa Cruz. And etc. etc.

Finals are soon. And I'm not horribly dreading them. I'm in a good state of mind for the most part. I just hope I do well in school. Parents are on my case about it 24/7 it seems. That's their job though right? Grahh... these darn angsty years. Well... I guess that's all I really need to talk about. I'm happy, and that should do it. Little things have been setting me off, but for the most part, I've got everything I need and I'm perfectly fine with it.

My love.

Currently Listening Idlewild By OutKast -- Morris Brown see related

So we are currently entering fall. One of my favorite seasons. It's pretty fantastic, I love when the air smells different. We need more rain here though, it dissapointed me when it turned all chilly and nice then went back to hot sun. I miss some people, and I need to give them all some calls. I hope cassie is doing well in vermont, I've talked to her once, but it sounds so nice there. You know, since my birthday is coming up and all, and I've been so stressed out with school and stuff, i'm thinking something simple. Last year was awesome, no doubt, but since I should probably give people a heads up, I want to go bowling. I'm super bad at it, don't fret. But in case the one down here doesn't open, we could probably go up to one in SJ and come back down. I've wanted to bowl for quite some time, not too much planning, and I can invite more people that way. I'm really excited for my birthday, even though I won't be able to drive. ahh well. I'm planning on making the ultimate CD, so I need some input on ya'll's favorite tracks so I can download them. Need some new music folks. Things are pretty well except for school. School is just too much hassle, and my parents think grades are all that make up my education. I know I have a D in math, it doesn't make it any better to harass me about it every day and threaten my social life with it. My mom sucks at math and so do I. I'm that other side of the brain. You know, right brain left brain. I always confuse them, but I'm the side that isn't totally great at science and math, but better with english etc. Well i should go soon. I need to figure some stuff out. Probably call some people too. Stayed home today. Ehh, I don't like calling people for hw. It's always so awkward. Oh well. Love you all.